Day 60: Sometimes You Get Paid in Better Ways
by Edward Smith
03 Sept 2020
Spending Your Time Wisely
If you read my last article entitled 🤠How to Choose Correctly When Life Sucker Punches You, you would have read about how I had to make a choice after a job loss between working for money or working for my kids. In this article, find out what I did, and why.
Daycare is Expensive and You're Not Around
We paid an average of about $572 per kid per month to ensure our two kids were safe, and being watched. It wasn't really about education. It was about keeping them out of harm's way and being safe from strangers.
That's about $13,000 a year that we were on the hook for regardless of if the service was good or mediocre. Often the service was mediocre. We were mainly paying out money to ensure an adult was present. It was basically large scale babysitting.
After I Lost My Job, Daycare Looked Too Expensive
After I lost my job, we noticed something. To make daycare work, we would have to come up with $13,000 whether I was employed or not. That's a big hurdle to overcome when you haven't been hired by anyone yet.
To put things in perspective, a minimum wage job where I was living averaged about $12.00 per hour.
So working 40 hours per week every week meant I might earn around $25,000 per year, and I'd keep approximately 85 percent of that or $21,216. Not bad, if I manage to land a full time job at full pay, but that situation is not guaranteed and it comes with a number of other risks and problems.
By working full time, I wouldn't be available to pick up my kids from school if anything went wrong. I wouldn't be available to take the kids to doctor's appointments.
I wouldn't be available to attend any of their events, and because my wife was also working full time, this meant that my kid's had two unreliable parents that were never available to be around when they were needed. I remember trying to organize parent teacher nights. It was almost impossible.
Some jobs are understanding about child care, but many get tired of having to deal with parents with kids if child care conflicts with work long term. You're not getting paid to watch your kids, you're getting paid to show up on time and work.
Many jobs expect you to find someone to take care of your kids behind the scenes, and that isn't always easy or possible. It usually means you need to hire someone to do it, and that can be on top of daycare, which has set hours.
On top of that, many minimum wage jobs usually require overtime and the ability to work different shifts throughout the week. Your hours are not guaranteed, and your hours can fluctuate depending on how business is going. Great when you're starting out, but scary if you are an established household and the money is needed.
How We Resolved It
Our situation was lucky, but the lessons I learned along the way can be applied to other people and their situation.
Since we were already living below our means, my wife and I were able to review our budget and change some things up. We decided to drop daycare, and use me as daycare instead. That bought us $13,000 per year doing that. That also meant the kids had a reliable parent watching over them every day.
We also looked at our options and determined that we could move cross country to a different work site within my wife's company. By doing this, my wife's salary was able to do more even though it's number had not changed. The cost of living in the new place was cheaper so we got more bang for our buck. That helped offset the loss of my job.
The point here, is we decided to get flexible with our approach and change some things up to overcome an obstacle. If you give things a chance, you might have more options then you first realize. Try looking at things again. You might surprise yourself.
Being a Stay At Home Parent Comes With Perks
Being a stay at home parent has been different, but it's been very rewarding. I have time to keep our house clean, and to model a clean home for my kids. I'm like one of those 50's wives but with a beard and a dingy t-shirt.
I also have been available to take my kids on outdoor excursions. We used our first summer to explore all of the local parks and trails around our area. That's something my wife has never had the time to really do, even though we've lived here for over two years.
I've gone grocery shopping with them and showed them how to to behave around strangers. I've attended my son's music and talent shows. He saw me there. He remembers it.
Every day I make my kids breakfast, lunch and dinner. We play games. We go on walks and talk about different things. I learn a lot from them, and they learn a lot from me.
At the time of this writing, the world is facing the pandemic. Schools are closed and people are being made to teach from home. My role has become even more important. It's a good thing I'm available.
It could have gone really crazy for our household if I was working full time. Not to mention expensive. Sometimes things happen for a reason. Embrace things when they change. You might be answering something important without even realizing it.
Conclusion
Life hours are valuable. They don't always come with a typical dollar amount like working hours do. You can't say you work for $12.00 an hour, when you are a stay at home parent, but that doesn't mean you didn't earn a wage that day. My kids have their father. They can see him. How much is that worth? To them I bet it's a lot.
My kids are getting to know me. I'm getting to learn about them. No job that I've ever worked at has ever had a perk like that. Life hours are extremely valuable. Use them wisely. If you get a chance to use them. Enjoy them.
They're precious.
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